Ever been filled with a strong emotion to the point you calmed down so much, you totally forgot everything? For a split second? and it made you feel mellow and easy going for awhile? Everything that made you glad, mad, sad, suddenly all switched around and it was like you were in love with life itself. Or the very song that took you into a trance like what happened to me.
My friend Brittany came over for the first time in what seems like a long time. We've played Wii Fit, Animal Crossing: City Folk, and talked and laughed all day. We bought Monster energy drinks and bags of Flamin' Hot Cheetos and Funnyons and a numerous amount of other junk food. Towards the end of the night, we were both very tired but she shared with me a band I had never heard of. Neon Indian.
She sat on my MacBook while I sat, lazily, staring at my scarecrow owl I had brought into the living room. His name is Jorge. While I listened to this music Brittany was looking up, I stared at Jorge in a trance. He was moving. Almost. He wasn't really but I forgot everything and everyone while staring at this plastic owl. This music took me into a trance I want back in. I was falling with the music. I was transcending into another realm almost. I was not here. Mind you, I was very tired and had by then drunk two Monster drinks. I think it was shortly after we went to bed but I was in the music. I was there with it. It was dancing with my mind. Almost whispering sweet nothings in my ear.
Almost...seducing me. Not in a "bad boy" way either. Coming up from behind me, holding my waste, and breathing on my neck, kind of seducing. Catching me while I fall and fall and fall, deeper and deeper and deeper into this wonderful abyss of music. Chills go through me every time I think about this sensation.
Saturday, February 25, 2012
Sunday, February 19, 2012
Jealous Guy
Lately the Beatles have been on my mind. Even when they went on to be on their own, it's been particularly strange to think they separated and began to suck. With the exception with a few actually good songs. Such as this one.
Now other than playing Twilight Princess and apologizing to all the innocent chickens (cocaos or whatever if you get techinical about Zelda) and start singing off key "I didn't mean to hurt you!" This is a beautiful song in it's entirety.
The first time I heard this song, I remember I was sitting in the back of my dad's scion when he was taking me to my mother's one night. He had taken out the front seat so he could clean it, so there was no way I could sit in the front, unless I had sat on the floor of the car. Dangerous. Anywho, my dad was playing John Lennon's Imagine album which at the time, I had never gotten to listen to so this was an opportunity for me. I had only heard Imagine so you can Imagine what it must have been like for me to hear some of the other songs (see what I did there? no, wait...nevermind...) Some of the songs were okay. I don't remember them. But then Jealous Guy came on.
I can't remember if there were any tears shed or not that night. But I do remember feeling a great deal of sadness and heartbreak. Feeling it for my family who have been through hardships and heartbreaks of heir own, my friends and their heartbreaks and lastly....my own. It was then I saw why and how beautiful this song really was.
Tonight I feel a bit sad and down. And I listened to this song. and in a way...it reassures me that I wasn't the only one who made a foolish mistake in a relationship, ya know? John wasn't the best husband to begin with and wasn't the best father but even though this is to his second wife Yoko, he was making up for what he did, admitting his mistakes. This is the sort of thing every man ought to do. But it's not only the men who are guilty. Women are too. I am too.
So...
I didn't mean to hurt you.
I'm sorry that I made you cry.
I didn't want to hurt you.
I'm just a jealous girl.
If you could ever find it in your heart to understand I'm just going through some emotions right now, I'm truly sorry. I love you so much and I don't want to lose you. You are my best friend, and I have come to realize, I don't think I could live without you. I could never, ever hate you. You are and always will be, Sweetness to me.
Debbie
Now other than playing Twilight Princess and apologizing to all the innocent chickens (cocaos or whatever if you get techinical about Zelda) and start singing off key "I didn't mean to hurt you!" This is a beautiful song in it's entirety.
The first time I heard this song, I remember I was sitting in the back of my dad's scion when he was taking me to my mother's one night. He had taken out the front seat so he could clean it, so there was no way I could sit in the front, unless I had sat on the floor of the car. Dangerous. Anywho, my dad was playing John Lennon's Imagine album which at the time, I had never gotten to listen to so this was an opportunity for me. I had only heard Imagine so you can Imagine what it must have been like for me to hear some of the other songs (see what I did there? no, wait...nevermind...) Some of the songs were okay. I don't remember them. But then Jealous Guy came on.
I can't remember if there were any tears shed or not that night. But I do remember feeling a great deal of sadness and heartbreak. Feeling it for my family who have been through hardships and heartbreaks of heir own, my friends and their heartbreaks and lastly....my own. It was then I saw why and how beautiful this song really was.
Tonight I feel a bit sad and down. And I listened to this song. and in a way...it reassures me that I wasn't the only one who made a foolish mistake in a relationship, ya know? John wasn't the best husband to begin with and wasn't the best father but even though this is to his second wife Yoko, he was making up for what he did, admitting his mistakes. This is the sort of thing every man ought to do. But it's not only the men who are guilty. Women are too. I am too.
So...
I didn't mean to hurt you.
I'm sorry that I made you cry.
I didn't want to hurt you.
I'm just a jealous girl.
If you could ever find it in your heart to understand I'm just going through some emotions right now, I'm truly sorry. I love you so much and I don't want to lose you. You are my best friend, and I have come to realize, I don't think I could live without you. I could never, ever hate you. You are and always will be, Sweetness to me.
Debbie
Thursday, February 9, 2012
VCR
It's February. I've been sick. Sinus infection or allergies, cold or flu, I don't know and I don't really care. I just want to get better. I've been feeling miserable.
A few days ago I arrived at my mom's house early in the morning. My mom had gone to work and her husband was asleep in bed. I was left to go to sleep or browse the internet, whatever my choice. I was feeling miserable. I was in a worse stage of my feeling like crap so I mostly wanted to sleep. I couldn't though. I was kind of hungry.
As always, my mother never really has things I find appetizing. I don't mean to be picky but come on, tv dinners? stupid health beneficial drinks? chocolate breakfast bars? No thank you. (yes, I skip on on the chocolate. actually those bars in particular hurt my teeth. they are hard to chew.)
Finding nothing and kind of disappointed, I turned to my refrigerator like most hopeless, idiots do when they think food will suddenly appear there. There was something however that I missed the first time that I checked it. A box of strawberries. Deep, red and so sweet looking. "I think I'll have one and head to bed." I took the box and opened it, got the most delicious one I spotted and washed it and took a bite. The sweetness of this strawberry made me feel so alive. Better than I had been. I didn't go to bed like I said. I took another strawberry and had more of these scrumptious beauties. They brought me so much comfort that I needed. and then I went to bed. and I slept, a restful sleep. Since then whenever I was feeling cruddy, I went downstairs and got me a few strawberries to make me feel better.
Lately I've been getting into this band called The Xx. and this song got in my head tonight. I kind of need a little bit of hope. a little bit of comfort. I want more strawberries. Tonight, this is my strawberry. This song kind of brings me the same feeling of relief and comfort that I needed that one morning. I didn't expect this but...for now, I need a strawberry.
They are so beautiful.
A few days ago I arrived at my mom's house early in the morning. My mom had gone to work and her husband was asleep in bed. I was left to go to sleep or browse the internet, whatever my choice. I was feeling miserable. I was in a worse stage of my feeling like crap so I mostly wanted to sleep. I couldn't though. I was kind of hungry.
As always, my mother never really has things I find appetizing. I don't mean to be picky but come on, tv dinners? stupid health beneficial drinks? chocolate breakfast bars? No thank you. (yes, I skip on on the chocolate. actually those bars in particular hurt my teeth. they are hard to chew.)
Finding nothing and kind of disappointed, I turned to my refrigerator like most hopeless, idiots do when they think food will suddenly appear there. There was something however that I missed the first time that I checked it. A box of strawberries. Deep, red and so sweet looking. "I think I'll have one and head to bed." I took the box and opened it, got the most delicious one I spotted and washed it and took a bite. The sweetness of this strawberry made me feel so alive. Better than I had been. I didn't go to bed like I said. I took another strawberry and had more of these scrumptious beauties. They brought me so much comfort that I needed. and then I went to bed. and I slept, a restful sleep. Since then whenever I was feeling cruddy, I went downstairs and got me a few strawberries to make me feel better.
Lately I've been getting into this band called The Xx. and this song got in my head tonight. I kind of need a little bit of hope. a little bit of comfort. I want more strawberries. Tonight, this is my strawberry. This song kind of brings me the same feeling of relief and comfort that I needed that one morning. I didn't expect this but...for now, I need a strawberry.
They are so beautiful.
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