when I woke up I had this sudden craving for Japanese food. Sesame chicken with rice. so good...i craved it so much that I went downstairs and fixed myself some mac and cheese. I make a lot of sense. there is nothing ever good to eat in this house.
I noticed it was fairly quiet in the house. my mom is at work, and her husband, I have no idea where he is. but no one's here. I'm used to being alone. I looked outside to see grey skies. Most people would hate days like these. thinking they are dreary and melancholy. I quite like it. I like different things for different reasons. I even noticed it wasn't that cold outside. It being November, I had expected it to be at least so cold, I needed shoes. I didn't need them.
Silence and solitude go hand in hand. While i waited and occasionally watched my macaroni cook, I sang these words.... "Forget about your house of cards and I'll do mine..."
This song holds sentimental value to me. I cannot tell you what because that would be going into way too much detail than one needs to know. in other words, I'm not about to let you know what goes through my head. but I will tell you what this song reminds me of.
In the Summer of 2010, I took a 20 day trip to Australia. At the time of when I left I was going through a difficult time for my grandmother on my father's side had died. I did not really know her well but I knew my father and I knew...that it was a struggling time for him. So I spent my trip being somewhat homesick and worried about my father.
I remember we spent a great deal of time on our tour bus. I remember the smell of it was sweet. I found it pleasant. and it was on this tour bus, I listened mostly to my iPod.
I cannot remember what day it was or where we were going but I think it had been one of the days we were only on the tour bus the entire day. I think we may have left our home stay families or were on our way to see them. I remember I had a seat next to the window. and we passed...what looked like a large cliff in the middle of nowhere. All made of red rock. Everywhere else was flat. it was sunset so the sun and the red of the rock were bright. and passing by it, this song came on. and it felt like a large echo. a comforting echo. Every time I listen to this song, I think of that time. and of course, the trip home as well.
On the plane flight back home, it was a 14 hour trip. Our plane was blessed to have a small tv set on the back of every seat for every passenger's entertainment. We could play games, watch movies, and...listen to music. There were only a few things I found in the music section that appealed to my liking. and one of them...was In Rainbows by Radiohead.
I remember setting it on this album and on House of Cards (at the time, I had only heard of two songs off the album) and looking at everything about the plane. It was dark. Everyone was either asleep or watching a movie. and I thought about...how quiet it all seemed. we weren't home and we weren't in Australia any longer. we were just here, on the plane. out, above the open ocean. I had been eager to be home but I also didn't want to leave as well. but I was here. no where else. and it was quiet. and it was dark.
I fell asleep. and rested peacefully. listening to this song.
that was the most restful sleep I've ever had in my life.
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